seva, the act of selfless service

[CALizzz]

I'm NOT such a good daughter. I was gruff with Virginia this morning.. The first change is the hardest. Change her, try and clean her and change her sheet.

I'm really asking for help from "THE Man" I get short with her, thaen feel terrible!!! I try and be empaithitc know if she could get up, she would!!

Teri sent a certified letter to get her medical records. They have 5-7 working days to produce!!

You guys, the really, really did damage in the last care facilty. One- they lied! My mom can't put it all together, she gets confused. But it's nothing short of elderly abbusie If
yousaw the phots, you wold cry.
d
he gets out and her M.D. didn't bother to do a a complete CT scan. Hell, hed didn't even LOOK at my moms kneee. She's been coplaing about a sore shoulder. When I touch/maggage her she winces. And it's on her left arm where rib case is!!

Talking to her today, she said the nighttime staff were the worse and she belives they were drunk and got off swing her on the hoist. Then when they
dropped her, one of the women came in and said she was so sorry.

I reeally belive they did this more, more than once.
I'm tryin to put the puzle together

As soon as we get her records, those amd sickening phots will go to the lawyer.

Thankns for letter me vent, cry and get rid of some of this AGNER and fear I feel for her.

Staying GRATEFUL--

Liz
XoX

 

[missmichelle]

It always amazes me how cruel people can be. Hang in there. I am sending good thoughts and prayers your way. I know how hard and trying it can be at times but your love for your mother really shines through.
The only way to put an end to the abuse of the elderly is to fight like you are doing. Thank you!

 

[ellie1969]

UNREAL Go see a lawyer And take them to court and make them pay!

 

[labell]

you're a good and loving daughter, and you're human. dust yourself off and fight on!

 

[cas1944]

Liz.you ARE a wonderful daughter. I know how hard it is to care for a loved one.
I loved my husband with all my heart and soul.After his last stroke and heart attack I was his care giver.And you are so right...The first changing of the day is the hardest.I would stay awake most of the night watching him breathe wondering if the next breath would be his last.By morning,I would be so tired, I would be short with him also and feel terrible later.
He would tell me how much he loved me several times a day and how terrible he felt because I had to change him and take care of him and I would tell him "I do this because I love you and we are one".

If he were here today I would do it all over again.

I miss him...

 

[Spin2Win]

you're a good and loving daughter, and you're human. dust yourself off and fight on!

My sentiments exactly!

Hang in there Liz. It's a tough road at time, but SO WORTH THE TRIP.

 

[CALizzz]

My streak friends come thru for me again! Thanks for all the posts!!!!

Cass-

He would tell me how much he loved me several times a day and how terrible he felt because I had to change him and take care of him and I would tell him "I do this because I love you and we are one".

This conversation happens a couple times a day. I ask her.. Would you rather have a stranger? Or why are you crying, I'm the one changing you- but i make her laugh.

I know she rests better when I'm here vs my Sister or Brother! She can be herself with me, and has no problem waking me at 3 for a drink of water! Or whatever the case my be. We are the closest, no doubt. She has never said no to me in my life- if it was something she could get for me, or pull off!

So, today I do SEVA! My newest favorite word

XoX
Liz

 

[casinosally0]

:angelunfortunately there are those people working in a nursing home or hospital that lack one major componant of nursing--COMPASSION. UNFORTUNATELY MANY WOULD BE BETTER OFF WORKING ON AN ASSEMBLY LINE. They aren't bad people just missplaced in a job.A good many of them took nurse aide training because they had no other options. Some nurses are going to nursing school for the BIG BUCKS. BUT THEY TOO LACK THE COMPASSION. I used to tell them- to remember that they were once self-reliant people like yourself, treat them as such. Unfortunately health care has become like an assembly line, and it is very scary. I work with these people everyday and often find myself asking why are they working here. I hope you can resolve the situation, maybe move her someplace else.

 

[CALizzz]

Thanks guys, and Sally!

She ended up in the Sub-Accute ward after she had a sub-durial hemorage. They believe it was caused from being on Cumadin for 17 yrs. She was on life support. She made it thru and menatlly she's in good shape!

She's at her own home now. I'm the main caregiver, housekeeper, cook, etc. etc.

Hevean sent her newest physical threapit!!! His name is Paul. He's in it for all the RIGHT reasons. Before we knew she had a fracture he incouraged, but never pushed. Now, she has pain at the top of her rib cage. He saw the photos I took when we brought her home. Now all of her problems are on that side!
He said he's experienced patinents who experience pain a couple months or so after the have some kind of injury. It may start small, but if you don't know and are doing p.t. with her, it just made the pain come out!!

We talked away from my Mom this afternoon. He suggested a shirnk or therapist because she's showing an increase in anxiety and tremors. fears when we talk about transfering her to her wheel chair or just seeing it or her walker!
He had tears running down his face. He said he feels like he's helping family when he comes here and to see the pics and now the set backs that are making him sick!

I visited almost everyday, and my Sister was there when I wasn't. This is a criminal case. I shudder to think the sick "games" they played with Virginia, one of the coolest ladies you'd ever meet!

She cries about her leg and now asks me, "why does it hurt under my arm Liz?" I kiss her and try and make her as comfortable as she can be.

I AM SICK AND LIVID!! But- these people and Dr.'s who lied and dropped the ball over and over WILL BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!

XoX
Liz

 

[CALizzz]

Just a Hey Now!!

I spent the afternoon in Topanga, danced to some music, saw some freinds. Then my good friend, son and I went to his sisters for a BBQ. I'm just feeling blessed, I've know these guys since high school!!

True friends/love is what it's all about!!! I feel a bit lighter and get to sleep in my bed tonight.

I know we're all gonna go, I'm the only survivour of my old Cancer support grp. and I was one of the sickest!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My Mom is dying. I know the diaper changes and all that pety shit won't be remembered. I do know we've had some openings as well as closure in the last couple weeks (especially) And I know it's going to kill me when she goes, but the time we have and had is priceless!! I really have a blessed life. Quality people I couldn't have picked better friends if I tried!!

Oh, I re-read or tried to re-read my first post- OMG!! I was not drunk! lol- just tore-up!!!! thanks for reading between the lines. Holy Moly!

Spin- that must have been a PAINFUL read for you my freind :friends

Love and Light

XoX
Liz