A LITTLE NOTE TO MY FRIENDS

[moslowjj]

Hello all you streakers, Sorry I haven't been around to support all the great contest here at the streak! I have had allot on my plate lately, My computer problems being the least I suppose. I find myself shying away from communicating with the people I care most about. The reason for this is to fool myself into thinking I won't hurt or worry them as bad if I stay away. You know out of site out of mind...I have never been able to finish my living will, I have lied to my Dr,s telling them I did when I was first told I had cancer. So for the 5th or 6th time I have been working on getting this paper work done. I feel by doing this I have given into the fact that my time is short even though I excepted this fact long ago its not the same. I have gotten to the point of taking care of normal daily tasks are almost to much for me to handle. I find myself gasping for air just taking the garbage out and having to rest before replacing the new bag..Scares me to no end because my mind is telling me that I can do everything and my lungs are telling me I'm dying. I know there are some of you that are as bad or worse than me and please know I am not wanting sympathy, Just understanding from those of you that are healthy and have not had to deal with the fact that your body giving out but your mind is healthy and can't do a damn thing to change this fact of life. It really hit me the other night when just doing a couple of tasks before going to bed I could not catch my breath almost to the point of panic and the fear was what to do, I couldn't go for help I wouldn't have made it 10 feet, I couldn't call anyone cause what could they do except worry for me and 911 would be 15 to 20 minutes minimum to get here. So for almost 15 minutes I just sat and tried to control my breathing so I wouldn't pass out or hyperventilate. Then I suppose you could say I cried feeling sorry and scared for myself, mostly scared wich made me worse. Last when tested to see if I qualified for medicare to pay the 600.00 + a month for oxygen I wasn't bad enough during sleeping hrs is when tested so I am awaiting appointment to retest. Again please no sympathy or tears... But maybe a little prayer wouldn't hurt... Thank you all for always being caring and understanding........mos

 

[jobill35]

Sorry to hear this I will keep you in my daily prayers

 

[mrsrobinson]

sorry to hear will keep u in my prayers

 

[sorcer3ss (RETIRED)]

Dear Mos I will keep you in my prayers, I do understand a little what you are going thru as I am an asthmatic and have the same problem at times, come in after putting the trash out and having to sit down gasping for air and recover before I can do anything else. I also know that fear of being alone when you are in the midst of an attack and it is horrible, and of course the more you panic the worse it gets. The last time I was taken to hospital I somehow managed to call my friend who came around immediately and waited with me for the ambulance.

What I can't understand is the US medical situation, here in Aus, if you are sick you get treatment whether you can afford it or not. Non emergency treatment is different, you need to go on a waiting list, but anything that is emergency you can get treated straight away. I do hope that you can get the oxygen that you so obviously need.

 

[judyb57]

You got all of us and all of our prayers hon, and that is one mightly powerful thing!

 

[iataz]

Jamie I know you said no tears but it didn't work.
I'm praying for you my friend.. and please as long as you are able to type on a keyboard keep coming here to be among those who love and care about you.

 

[CareyG]

So sorry for what you are going through Jamie. I will be saying BIG prayers for you! I hope you get the oxygen machine fast, you really need it and it makes me sick that they are making you wait!! Big hugs to you sweetie!
​

 

[cas1944]

Jamie I know you said no tears but it didn't work.
I'm praying for you my friend.. and please as long as you are able to type on a keyboard keep coming here to be among those who love and care about you.

I cried too.I couldn't help it. I know what you're going through.Breathing has become an effort for me also.It can be really scary.

You are in my thoughts and prayers Jamie.

 

[Precious]

So sorry to hear.I will kepp you in my Prayers

 

[WinnerPLZ]

Jamie I know you said no tears but it didn't work.
I'm praying for you my friend.. and please as long as you are able to type on a keyboard keep coming here to be among those who love and care about you.

No Kidding Iataz I couldn't help the tears either. Just know that you will be in my prayers daily also. hope you get the help you need.

 

[beaches3572]

Thank you for sharing! My prayers are with you.

 

[CALizzz]

It's good to see you post. I think of you everyday Jamie

Prayers and healing vibes,
Liz

really, truly

 

[vixen777]

I think of you Jamie all the time I am saying prayers and come tell us anytime what is happening that is what friends are for!!:0))

 

[Spin2Win]

No tears? I don't think so Mos!!

You're in my continued thoughts and prayers.

God Bless

 

[moslowjj]

Thank you all, I broke down again right after this post. Damn comp. like puttin a new tube in the old tvs fix one the rest start goin out...lol Just reading all your post made my day!! Docs going to run more tests next week see whats up?? Feelin better today, Almost good enough to Streak.....hahaha How sweet u is streakers...mos

:flrs

 

[CareyG]

Hi Jamie!! So glad your feeling better and you will be hanging with us Streakers more now!!
​

 

[pevangel]

hi moslowjj


you do not know me but my heart is with you, and i will keep you everyday in my prayers. may god bless you always. you my dear are an inspiration for all of us, i am so glad you did this post. you inspire me beyond beleif. thank you.


god bless

pevangel

 

[krazy2go]

Jamie, I don't know you very well, but may I offer some suggestions with regards to getting the oxygen tank? If you have a good relationship with your doctor, be brutally honest with him/her about what you've told us here. All the doctor has to do is write a script for it if they believe you are in need of it. Tests may not always reflect "the whole story". You've GOT to fill in the blanks, which may be part of what is holding it up. Also, see if medicare will cover a "life alert" bracelet. And, I'm not sure what your income level is, but also ask your doctor for referrals for visits from "Home Health" aids or some type of care for someone to come to your home once or twice a week and see if it's covered. I know that some states offer these servics under Medicare and they are fully paid for.

I'm not sure what state you are in, but if you want, PM me and maybe I can get you a link for futher resources that might help. Dangit, if my in-laws could get all the "freebies" while not even being Idaho residents for very long, I don't see why in hell you can't, where ever you live. It's sometimes just a matter of finding where to get them.

You're in my thoughts and prayers too. Keep your spirits up. And, if you need a smile, just think of me or Judy slipping off our treadmills and bouncing our way across the floor.

J/K Judy!

:try

 

[karen40]

Jamie, I'm so sorry you are goingthrough this pain... My prayers are with you always:flrs

 

[moslowjj]

Thank you all again, Krazy i'm in WA state and on SSI and have medicare A,B,and D I don't know why my doc would tell me that medicare won't pay unless I fail the test?? She knows about these episodes and cares very much for me. But I am going to ask her again to find out if she can write a script for it. But do believe she would have if all possible to get this for me.... Thanks for the input....mos