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CALizzz

Lifetime Streaker
Joined
Feb 24, 2008
Messages
2,503
Send prayer to Virginia, my Mom. She's not doing well. I almost called the ambulance last night, but my sister came over and we got her changed.

She's 85 and I feel and I'm with her almost everyday she's fading. My sister is in complete denial. Right now it's just Teri and I. Teri works full time, good thing for me I'm off right now. I am totally depressed, try not to show it to my Mom- my sister on the other hand thinks yelling at someone can cure them- like I said she's in complete denial. I asked her to scream the cancer outta me- and my Bi-polar. I was depressed, but when I started seeing my shrink- he said- Liz- your Bi-polar. It started when my mom got really ill.

Last night I had flash-backs of the way she was when she had the sub-durial hemorage. At the time I said let her go. Asked the Dr.'s IF she survived what would be quality vs. quantiy?? The Dr.'s looked at me as if I was the only sane one in the room.

I'm going to tend to her now. We are the closest and I love her soo much. She asked me yesterday why they didn't let her die?? I told her I was her advicate but was out voted. I wanted to put this here before I go take care of her, I don't want her to see me cry.

It's not only affecting her, I am totally depressed and at times suicidle. Thinking thats my only way out and then my sister will HAVE to do something QUICK.. I've been here 8-9 months and it's killing me too. So if you can throw prayers or vibes for both of us, they would be more then welcome.

The house is "falling down". It's soo hard to stay upbeat. And this should not be a "pissing contest" between Teri and I!!!

Love and Light, Liz

P.S- you know I can't spell for S h i t- but I know you get my drift!

XoXoXoX
 

CALizzz

Lifetime Streaker
Joined
Feb 24, 2008
Messages
2,503
When my sister gets here this evening, I'm going to tell her we need to get mom to the hospital. See- I was away for 3 weeks with a BAD flu- 2 courses of anti-biotics etc. I came to my Mom's not completley well. Even gloves and masks didn't help.

She's been in bed for over a week, getting better but her strength and will are fading. We just had a really special talk and tears.

I told her I don't believe in god!!! How could such a divine being cause soo much pain and suffering ALL OVER THE WORLD?? My oncologist, Raul Mena is an atheist and he does wonders. He bought me 18 yrs. with stage 4 non-hodgkens lymphomia!

If you see this, keep us in mind. I really love you guys!!!!

XoXoX Liz
 

sorcer3ss

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Staff member
Joined
Feb 25, 2008
Messages
69,020
Thank you for sharing your feelings here Liz, I always think that a problem shared is a problem halved. I am so sorry what you and your family are going through, it is a very stressful and difficult situation. I was a carer for my mum for a couple of years and I know how hard it is, as I was an only child there was no one to share the burden with, and it was made all the more difficult as my children were young, Mark was only about 4 at time. It is a pity that your sister isn't seeing things as they are, as you said she is in denial. I don't know what else to say except that my thoughts are with you, and even though you don't believe in God, my prayers as well. Hang in there hon, look after yourself as best as you can, this situation will not last forever, and then at least you will be left with the good thoughts of how you tried to do everything for you mum that you could possibly do.
 

CALizzz

Lifetime Streaker
Joined
Feb 24, 2008
Messages
2,503
Thank you my friend.. My sister just got here with her lovley attitude, we are calling the ambulance.

XoX
Liz
 

Silkprint

Lifetime Streaker
Joined
Feb 25, 2008
Messages
2,083
Aw hunny ...I am glad it went well with your sis . You need a break and I cannot believe she doesn't or won't see that .
I am pming you my number . I moved since I last gave it to you . Love baby and please stay as strong as I know you are
 

pevangel

Lifetime Streaker
Joined
Feb 16, 2009
Messages
903
ahhhh CALizzz :friendsmy heart is going out to you I am praying for you and your mom and your sister, I do beleive in God and I do understand your torment, I lost my wonderful great sister it will be 2 years november 15th, so beleive me I truly understand your feelings, I have been there. Dont give up calizz please, you have so many folks right here who truly care about you, please never forget that, we are here for you. Much Blessing to you and your family.



pevangel
 

judyb57

Super Moderator
Joined
Feb 20, 2008
Messages
0
Let your friends be there for you Liz. We all have or had our rough times and know that it takes friends to help you through. :hug
 

CALizzz

Lifetime Streaker
Joined
Feb 24, 2008
Messages
2,503
Aw hunny ...I am glad it went well with your sis . You need a break and I cannot believe she doesn't or won't see that .
I am pming you my number . I moved since I last gave it to you . Love baby and please stay as strong as I know you are

And a huge thanks to all of you!!!

OH Silky!!! It didnt go well with my sister at all. She's got to be the meanest, ugly woman I've ever met.

Before the Paramedics came- I met her out side and told her- if you yell at Mom I will hurt you BAD!

I'd love to talk to you soon. When the paramedics were here- and her room was full, I've met them all at least 3 times... I came to let my friends know the happs. Her comment was- "Are you doiing something usefull, or just on the computer" I told her I was letting people who love me and Virginia what was going on!

XoXoXOXO

Love you all bunches- Liz
 
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CareyG

Owner
Staff member
Joined
Jan 8, 2008
Messages
66,336
I am so sorry Lizzie!! I am praying for your mom of course and for you and your sister too. I hope you guys can come to some mutual understanding about your mom and life in general. I know you have not gotten along very well with your sister but I gotta tell ya, I would give anything in the world to have my brother back and you may not realize it until its too late, you really need to make peace with each other. Bug hugs to you and Virginia and please keep us updated on how she is doing. We are all always here for you!:hug
 

PIXIEW

Lifetime Streaker
Joined
May 12, 2008
Messages
3,355
lizz i am oh so very :sorry to hear about your mom!:grr i am so sick of just about everyone having a terminally ill family member geez whats this world coming to! i really think deep down you believe in god your words "So if you can throw prayers or vibes for both of us, they would be more then welcome."believe me ive had my fair share of my faith being in yo-yo motion it sucks! :sadly please please dont think of this "It's not only affecting her, I am totally depressed and at times suicidle. Thinking thats my only way out and then my sister will HAVE to do something QUICK " you have tears rolling down my cheeks like running water ~its not good to end our own misery believe me that thought has ran through my head a couple times but left as quick as it came ~ especially thinking your sister will then pick up at where she "should" be in the first place, but my heart tells me she would not from what you've written and to end your life for the lack of life your sister is choosing is not cool i say make her life hell and stick around with us! your streak
:friendswe need you! i will give all my energy and prayers and pass to you and your mom to get through this the best you can thats what we have to do is our best then in the end we have no regrets and cant say "i wish i would have " i hope and pray for the best outcome out of this for you and your mom what that is i cant say i just ish you both well and please know you and your mom in in my heart i will cross my fingers, toes,legs, arms and 'eyes if i knew how' ( tried to maybe just maybe make you crack a small smile over my crossing eyes) :crssd
 
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CALizzz

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Joined
Feb 24, 2008
Messages
2,503
Thank you all for taking the time thought and energy to post. It means a lot!

I got to the hospital around 9 after getting lost 4 times. I don't live up here but I almost made it to Magic Mountain! About 20 miles away. Knew that was WRONG.

Of course the hospital was PACKED. They put a I.V. in. My Mom was complaing of shortness of breath and chest pains.

Well, she has phenoma. It should have been picked up by her useless M.D, G.P. a couple weeks ago when he did tests. He gave her antibiotics he told Teri he saw a "spot" on her lung and to bring her back if the antibiotics didn't clear it up. He is compltey useless. I think his Mom and Dad picked his carrer cause I had to ask for the X-ray! Can you say Law Suit???

My sister split around 2- she has a full time job which we hear about everytime we see her!! Anyway she left and the Dr. ordered a shot of Moraphine, I said and wheres mine? :ohboy She waited 8 or 9 hours for a bed, they had her on a gurrny in a holding room. Finally at 5:50 they got her in her room. I told the nurses about her painful leg- again, her Dr. didn't order any X rays 8? months ago. I brought him the photos. He just shruged it off. A couple of his nurses were in tears. Said it was elder abuse and we could still call the sherrif!! The place she was in before abused her and lied. Told my Sister she had a "bump" on her chest, when we brought her home, she was every color bruised you can think of!! Her right side. She was doing physical therapy for THREE months, trying to walk when her knee swelled to to size of a small cantalope. She was trying to walk with a hair-line fracture on her right Knee, where all the damage was done. I have pictures and a disk and we have a lawyer. She said she doesn't want the money ( she could use it) I said do it for those that don't have a voice.

Just stopped in to fill you in. Judy, St. silky thank you!
And Pixiew your right my faith goes back and forth. When I get on a freeway on ramp, I make the sign of the cross and say- ok God get us there safe. And I say thank god a lot. I'm just human trying to figure it out.

Going back to sleep, phones off- I let my sister know, so they can call her today. I need rest bad!

Love you guys. Vix, Carey, you may have had a vision when you started your forums- but I have a feeling you never thought they'd have such an impact!! Thanks for that!! :friends
And I'm so sorry for everyone eles's loss!!!

And just to be on the safe side, I'm going to one of my Dr.s to make sure I dont have phenoma, the flu I had, had me in bed for 3 weeks.

XoXoX Liz
 
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labell

Lifetime Streaker
Joined
Nov 8, 2008
Messages
4,346
I just saw your posts, so sorry you're having such illnesses! Hard to keep the faith in the face of such adversity... you are such a wonderful person, and your mom likewise to have had a daughter like you! Rest, get well, she's in good hands in the hospital, they can build her back up and get her stronger again.... prayers are with you and Virginia!
 

dani3839

Administrator
Staff member
Joined
Jan 17, 2008
Messages
82,793

I'm so sorry dear! I will keep you and your mom in
my prayer!

 

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